No exercise yesterday and no Prozac makes Johnnie a bit agitated. Going to remedy this by a trip to the gym tonight. I got a bit angry with my boss today. New member of staff started and I showed him round.
Need to do a tax form tonight - I always leave it late but the pressure is on so I can cope. Need to find some information to fill it in.
Back on top of my racing competition this afternoon with two races to go. My aim is the maximum score in the competiton to date need another 55 points or so.
Spoke to my sister about her new baby yesterday - both she and her husband seem quite stressed by it all.
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
Monday, January 28, 2008
Today I proposed
I proposed to my girlfriend today. Odd you may think when we have already planned a wedding and a honeymoon....she said yes - can't be too bad a day.
Work was ok but had a glitch at 9.00am. My new desktop has a different version of powerpoint to my laptop - no presentation was forthcoming. Had to postpone class for an hour.
Heard that one of the students was going to take medication for depression. I told the tutor beware and that I had taken it. He is a bit of a gossip though so watch for what happened.
Birds deposited on my car today - supposed to be lucky.
I proposed where my girlfriend where we first held hands - romantic or what?
The ring is sparkly - aquamarines with diamonds and big smile on her face.
Today goes down as a good day.
Work was ok but had a glitch at 9.00am. My new desktop has a different version of powerpoint to my laptop - no presentation was forthcoming. Had to postpone class for an hour.
Heard that one of the students was going to take medication for depression. I told the tutor beware and that I had taken it. He is a bit of a gossip though so watch for what happened.
Birds deposited on my car today - supposed to be lucky.
I proposed where my girlfriend where we first held hands - romantic or what?
The ring is sparkly - aquamarines with diamonds and big smile on her face.
Today goes down as a good day.
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Sunday update
Went for the run this morning and was out for an hour. I was doing OK for the first part but after about 30 mins I took in too much air and started coughing. Walked for a while through a park (lots of families with children - its the first decent Sunday for a while) then Fartleked for 20 minutes. Feel good and relaxed without the spaced out feeling of Prozac.
Waiting for the engagement ring to be delivered this evening. My other half was talking about an engagement party next weekend - Prozac may have to make a reappearance.
My sister is back from hospital and is doing well with her daughter. Expect to speak with her this evening as well.
Life is not too bad and I have even read my lecture notes for tomorrow.
Waiting for the engagement ring to be delivered this evening. My other half was talking about an engagement party next weekend - Prozac may have to make a reappearance.
My sister is back from hospital and is doing well with her daughter. Expect to speak with her this evening as well.
Life is not too bad and I have even read my lecture notes for tomorrow.
Saturday, January 26, 2008
I didn't go to the match
Typical - my team are in town, they cause the upset of the day, and I didn't go. Wait till Monday though, my colleagues won't want to talk about it. Would the team still have won if I had been there - thats a question that will remain unanswered.
A good day all round. I was the top points scorer in my racing competition, but I am still second. I like to come from behind and win on the line though by doing just enough.
Looking forward to a nice roast in a minute or so. That always puts a smile on my face.
Life is OK. Felt more withdrawal symptoms today and my Charlie Brown face comes back at times.
Tomorrow I am expecting the engagement ring to be delivered. Decided as well to go for a run as exercise always makes me feel better. Check tomorrow to see if I did.
A good day all round. I was the top points scorer in my racing competition, but I am still second. I like to come from behind and win on the line though by doing just enough.
Looking forward to a nice roast in a minute or so. That always puts a smile on my face.
Life is OK. Felt more withdrawal symptoms today and my Charlie Brown face comes back at times.
Tomorrow I am expecting the engagement ring to be delivered. Decided as well to go for a run as exercise always makes me feel better. Check tomorrow to see if I did.
Friday, January 25, 2008
Day 2 without Prozac
Had a migraine today - first for ages - anything to do with withdrawal symptoms? Perhaps someone might comment. The other reason may have been a new monitor with the brightness at 100% or the wrong angle.
Its the weekend and Burns night. Some steaks with a tot of Talisker on the menu.
Became an Uncle again yesterday - my sister is doing well and should be out tomorrow. Pleased for her (she is 38 and its her first) - she had to wait until her husband had got a proper job. She used to say he was high maintenance - but hey hes a bloke.
Looking forward to the weekend and some chilling time with my girlfriend. May even go and watch my side play footie this weekend.
Its the weekend and Burns night. Some steaks with a tot of Talisker on the menu.
Became an Uncle again yesterday - my sister is doing well and should be out tomorrow. Pleased for her (she is 38 and its her first) - she had to wait until her husband had got a proper job. She used to say he was high maintenance - but hey hes a bloke.
Looking forward to the weekend and some chilling time with my girlfriend. May even go and watch my side play footie this weekend.
Thursday, January 24, 2008
No prozac today
I did not like the effect of Prozac yesterday so I cut it out today. So far so good. I feel a lot more with it and sharper than I have been.
Fell asleep at 7.20pm yesterday after a couple of Magners and a meal. Did a lot of dreaming as well so when I woke up I decided enough was enough.
Fell asleep at 7.20pm yesterday after a couple of Magners and a meal. Did a lot of dreaming as well so when I woke up I decided enough was enough.
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Lecturing with Prozac
Today I did not feel here and nearly went home at lunchtime. Had a lively class who asked lots of questions which made me feel quite good. Lecturing with Prozac gives you confidence.
This morning I actully looked at documentataion my ex wife's solicitor sent in October. It was a big hurdle even to begin to look at it. Just found out she bought a car in August - she can't be that badly off. Picking up speed to sort the mess out now.
I do a competition on horse racing each day - you have to pick a horse and score points on its position and starting price. I am back on top. it is a monthly competition which I won in September and was second in October then had two poor months. Reflects my mood. This is a good sign that I am back on top.
Onwards and upwards.
This morning I actully looked at documentataion my ex wife's solicitor sent in October. It was a big hurdle even to begin to look at it. Just found out she bought a car in August - she can't be that badly off. Picking up speed to sort the mess out now.
I do a competition on horse racing each day - you have to pick a horse and score points on its position and starting price. I am back on top. it is a monthly competition which I won in September and was second in October then had two poor months. Reflects my mood. This is a good sign that I am back on top.
Onwards and upwards.
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Bullying at work
I think I am being bullied at work. It has happened before when I have a sign of weakness - snide comments using attrition tactics. I survived before will survive again.
People say I look tired. It might be my diet. I do drink more than the Government recommends but when I cut down I get tired. I must get calories from the stuff.
Not as whoosie today but the prozac is still kicking in. My approach is to chip away at things. Last night I even started a letter to my ex wife's solicitor. I have been chipping away at work as well today.
Going to visit a company this afternoon possibly for paid consultancy - a change is as good as a rest.
People say I look tired. It might be my diet. I do drink more than the Government recommends but when I cut down I get tired. I must get calories from the stuff.
Not as whoosie today but the prozac is still kicking in. My approach is to chip away at things. Last night I even started a letter to my ex wife's solicitor. I have been chipping away at work as well today.
Going to visit a company this afternoon possibly for paid consultancy - a change is as good as a rest.
Monday, January 21, 2008
First Teaching Day
Students are back after Christmas break and I taught for 4 hours from 9-13.00. Enjoyed it I must admit. Sunk a little bit this afternoon after the initial euphoria.
People tell me that once you have taken Prozac for 3 weeks you get to a level rather than the ups and downs i seem to be experiencing now. Felt a bit whoosie mid morning and this is still with me - its about 2.40pm.
I need to spend some time sorting out finances in preparation for a settlement of my divorce. I have been putting this of for a while. I heard on the radio this morning that today is the worst day of the year for depression - dull skies and Christmas credit card bills being the main culprits. Hey things have to get better.
Its hard to motivate yourself sometimes. Told more people I was on Prozac today.
People tell me that once you have taken Prozac for 3 weeks you get to a level rather than the ups and downs i seem to be experiencing now. Felt a bit whoosie mid morning and this is still with me - its about 2.40pm.
I need to spend some time sorting out finances in preparation for a settlement of my divorce. I have been putting this of for a while. I heard on the radio this morning that today is the worst day of the year for depression - dull skies and Christmas credit card bills being the main culprits. Hey things have to get better.
Its hard to motivate yourself sometimes. Told more people I was on Prozac today.
Sunday, January 20, 2008
It was not a blow out
Very restrained last night - good food and moderate alcohol. A bit queasy this morning though.
Had a Prozac slightly later this morning. Went to church and felt OK. Bloating seems to have stopped for the moment and did not feel too distant today. Just had a sauna and that always makes me feel better.
Quiet day otherwise. Forgot to mention I had a letter yesterday - 2-3 month wait for counselling - good job I got the Prozac.
I am quite happy to tell people I am taking Prozac - they say its good I am talking about it.
Had a Prozac slightly later this morning. Went to church and felt OK. Bloating seems to have stopped for the moment and did not feel too distant today. Just had a sauna and that always makes me feel better.
Quiet day otherwise. Forgot to mention I had a letter yesterday - 2-3 month wait for counselling - good job I got the Prozac.
I am quite happy to tell people I am taking Prozac - they say its good I am talking about it.
Saturday, January 19, 2008
Saturday update
Prozac seems to have most impact for me about 4-6 hours after taking it. I was spaced out on the stage at the graduation ceremony yesterday (around 1.00pm) then had a couple of ciders about 3.00pm. I did not feel all there but felt OK.
Drove home at about 5.00pm. Had some steak and wine and popcorn and chocolate. Sweated a lot in the night though.
Today the same thing happened. At around midday I was in a travel agent trying to book a honeymoon (yes you heard right) and I was a bit spaced out. Had a sugar burst via a couple of glutn free fruit bars and that helped. After lunch I went out but still felt distant.
Big test for my body tonight. We are going out to a foodies house (they like to drink as well) so I will gauge the effect of a blowout on my body.
As regards libido the secret is relaxation. Prozac with a stiff drink - hey presto...
Drove home at about 5.00pm. Had some steak and wine and popcorn and chocolate. Sweated a lot in the night though.
Today the same thing happened. At around midday I was in a travel agent trying to book a honeymoon (yes you heard right) and I was a bit spaced out. Had a sugar burst via a couple of glutn free fruit bars and that helped. After lunch I went out but still felt distant.
Big test for my body tonight. We are going out to a foodies house (they like to drink as well) so I will gauge the effect of a blowout on my body.
As regards libido the secret is relaxation. Prozac with a stiff drink - hey presto...
Friday, January 18, 2008
Does prozac affect your libido?
Yes it does from my point of view - it brings it back. I was pleasantly surprised how perky I was last night.
Prozac seemed to me to kick in yesterday. When I got home about 6.00 pm a was light headed. It makes you feel like you have just had a yoga session or that feeling you get when you have done a lot of exercise and and are pleasantly content.
Had a pill a couple of hours ago - its about 9.30 am and I feel fine. Even a couple of vitriolic emails from my boss don't seem to phase me at the moment. I am going to a graduation ceremony later today when I will process in full academic gear and sit on a stage for 90 minutes. I feal as if I might just float on there.
Looking forward to this evening to see if I get the same effects as last night. I will let you know...
Prozac seemed to me to kick in yesterday. When I got home about 6.00 pm a was light headed. It makes you feel like you have just had a yoga session or that feeling you get when you have done a lot of exercise and and are pleasantly content.
Had a pill a couple of hours ago - its about 9.30 am and I feel fine. Even a couple of vitriolic emails from my boss don't seem to phase me at the moment. I am going to a graduation ceremony later today when I will process in full academic gear and sit on a stage for 90 minutes. I feal as if I might just float on there.
Looking forward to this evening to see if I get the same effects as last night. I will let you know...
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Thursday's Thoughts
I am now on my third Prozac tablet. Combined them with a couple of pain killers this morning. The back is still bad (struggled to bend over the fridge this morning) but the painkillers helped. I had a manic busdriver this morning who accelerated towards speed bumps - this made my back worse as I was sitting on the back seat and nearly hit the roof each time we passed over them.
Mood is OK but a bit sad. I showed a student who is expecting a baby in April pictures of my three children but I struggle to remember their ages. I have not seen them for three years now and they only live 20 minutes away. I sent them each a cheque for Christmas. Two if them cashed them but the other ripped his up and sent it back. I got the letter on my first day back at work - a good start to the year?
My partner said she could see a difference with the Prozac last night in that I have less of a Charlie Brown face as she calls it. Not bad for two days. Hey but the stuff is making me bloated and windy.
Mood is OK but a bit sad. I showed a student who is expecting a baby in April pictures of my three children but I struggle to remember their ages. I have not seen them for three years now and they only live 20 minutes away. I sent them each a cheque for Christmas. Two if them cashed them but the other ripped his up and sent it back. I got the letter on my first day back at work - a good start to the year?
My partner said she could see a difference with the Prozac last night in that I have less of a Charlie Brown face as she calls it. Not bad for two days. Hey but the stuff is making me bloated and windy.
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
Day 2 with Prozac
After two months on being down and miserable, and after comments from work colleagues I went to the doctors on Monday 14th January 2008 and told him I thought I was depressed. We discussed reasons and options to consider. I did not want time off work because I thought it would make me worse. I did not want pills - I did not want to appear with a permanent grin on my face. The prospect of counselling appealed more but there was a waiting list. I opted for pills plus counselling. I took my first Prozac yesterday. Its Wednesday today and I thought it might be good to record my thoughts and progress here.
How did I get here - no surprise if I say divorce, work situation, mid life crisis - the usual stuff. I have had bouts of depression before but not as long as this one. Time to shake it off and start living again.
Initial thoughts on Prozac (first taken on Tuesday 15th) were a tingling in the ears soon after the first one yesterday. Felt OK afterwards. In the evening felt a bit whoosie. Had a glass of cider and a meal. Felt very bloated though even though I am careful with my diet (avoid gluten, dairy and soya).
Wednesday 16th awoke with a back ache and an upset stomach. Got to admit I don't feel as sad today as on Monday. One of my colleagues about my age also has a bad back - we compare notes.
How did I get here - no surprise if I say divorce, work situation, mid life crisis - the usual stuff. I have had bouts of depression before but not as long as this one. Time to shake it off and start living again.
Initial thoughts on Prozac (first taken on Tuesday 15th) were a tingling in the ears soon after the first one yesterday. Felt OK afterwards. In the evening felt a bit whoosie. Had a glass of cider and a meal. Felt very bloated though even though I am careful with my diet (avoid gluten, dairy and soya).
Wednesday 16th awoke with a back ache and an upset stomach. Got to admit I don't feel as sad today as on Monday. One of my colleagues about my age also has a bad back - we compare notes.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
